Out with the Old

Hello,

Last year my word of the year was "Create". I wanted to be more creative, maybe even attempt some mixed media artwork. That did not happen. I currently have a two-toned house maybe that counts as mixed media. (Half done paint job, long story)
More importantly, I wanted to create the life that God had for me, or should I say be open to the life he was calling me too.

So what was 2012 like for me?

My bible study which we call a Quad really grew in number and in many cases in depth. About half way through the year I began teaching the study. God created a ministry for me that I was not seeking.

Later, this same group began studying the book of James in the Bible. If I am honest, I was actually quite afraid of this book. I learned so much about treating others and really rested in the grace of what it means to be a Christian. yes there is tons of grace in James.

I started 2012, not sure if I should stay at the church that I had landed in after the turmoil of leaving a church that I had gone too for 17 years. I really saw God making me feel at home in this body of Christ this past year. My House Church helped me with some problems I was having in my house which didn't always work out. It made me realize these people care about me, and I care about them. I started volunteering in the nursery, which is really rather fun, minus the dirty diapers. I started helping work with women as they go through the Gospel Class, which is basically Christianity 101. I met lots of great people and really saw that God had a purpose in them being in my life. I am even seeing that more in 2013.

Relationships (yes, I am talking men here). I ran into a guy I knew from church a few years ago one night shopping (before you think this goes anywhere, I am old enough to be his mother). He challenged me to consider if my heart was open to dating. This made me realize that maybe I need to be more open to the idea of dating and to stop saying things like "men don't like me" (making sure people know that I like men), and "I am too old for everyone I know". So I would like to say that I met the man of my dreams and ran off and got married the next day, but that didn't happen. If you really know me, you would know it would take me probably a year to really trust someone to even think about marriage. Well I digress, I am feeling a lot less content in my singleness, but maybe it is good because while I am content with my life, I want there to be room for others in it also.

Work: After applying for everything under the sun and letting my teaching license expire, I suddenly got a new job. Most of the year I was dreadfully unhappy. I had to stop working my part-time job because my full-time job which I began to dislike more and more became suddenly inflexible. So somehow in the fall, someone I know recommended that I apply for a job, and now I have it. I am still at the hospital, but I am doing something completely different, clinical research. It is lots of reading, learning, and figuring things out for right now, but I love all those things. Plus, I actually needed my college degree for it which for the most part I had never used. What a Blessing!!

So if you made it this far, you will see that I did not review a single book... I promise to write a goal for 2013 soon. I'm thinking about Freedom!!

At Every Turn by Anne Mateer

Hello,
One day I am going to post something amazing that will grow my readers to millions. Instead all I ever seem to do is do book reviews.

So here I go....

At Every Turn by Anne Mateer is a novel. I am a fast reader, it took me only a few hours to read. I think it would be a good book for a teenager.

Alyce lives in 1916. She is a member of a wealthy family in the country. Her family is pretty dysfunctional we would say today and multigenerational. Her grandmother is an invalid. She has an amazing relationship with Alyce and a strong faith. Alyce shares this strong faith. Her father loves the countryside, his business, and cars. He has recently begun his own race team. So the story has some moments on the early tracks in Indy and Chicago. The early days of the Brickyard. Alyce shares this passion for cars and likes her father's money. The mother wants to be in the city and she wants to marry Alyce off to some successful man in the city. Alyce wants to get married is about the only thing that she has in common with her mother.

The novel begins with Alyce driving her fancy new car to the small town church. She doesn't see that this separates her form the rest of the congregation. Some missionaries are at the church and share their story about orphans in Africa. Alyce pledges three thousand dollars (she thinks her father will pay) to the African orphans and commits the church to matching it. Keep in mind, it is 1916--this would be like 61,000 today or more than many make in a year.

Her father refuses to give anything to something about God. Alyce begins to beg the townspeople for money. In doing so she discovers lots of needs in her own backyard. She gives it away as quickly as she gets it.  Finally she comes up with the idea to race her father's new car. She somehow talks her father's mechanic into letting her do this. Keep in mind, very few women race cars today, 100 years ago it would have been shocking.So thus begins a web of deceit and lies all in order to give money away to missions.

The drama is between whether Alyce will end up with the mechanic Webster (her mother would hate that), her father's business associate Lawrence who attends church with her, or someone else who her parents would find acceptable. As the novel progresses, every one has their secrets which they scheme to keep from revealing.

The whole thing is rather silly. I think their are some good messages. Know your gifts and rest in them. Don't get so carried away with a great need--that you miss needs around you. Don't be impulsive even for good things. God gives you a sound mind for a purpose.

I received no compensation for this review, other than a copy of the book from Bethany House, a division of Baker Publishing.

To Love and Cherish

Oh the irony of the 40 something never married writing a book review of To Love and Cherish by Tracie Peterson and Judith Miller, a Bridal Veil Island  book.

What is Bridal Veil Island? It is a resort for the rich northerners in 1898. The first book in the series was about the beginning of the resort. When a family private island is turned into a resort in order for the family to survive. You can read this book without reading the first because it is a different time period and has none of the same characters.

The main characters are Melinda and Evan. Melinda works for a wealthy family and spends her summers on Bridal Veil. Evan works at Bridal Veil full-time as a gamekeeper. The story begins with Melinda not too patiently waiting for a proposal. Se leaves angrily when Evan has no idea that she expects this. They are brought together again when a hurricane threatens the island and Melinda comes on her own to find out what is going on.

Evan has lots of plans for his future which in his mind involves Melinda, but only after he is stable and able to care for his family.

I think this book is mostly about what it means to wait. Something this single girl knows a lot about. The problem is that Melinda like many of us gets involved in many a scheme to push it along. She fails to trust Evan and thinks the grass may be greener with someone else.

It was a light funny read and has some mysteries thrown in, one about a horse and another about President McKinley. It was just alright, not a classic but entertaining.

I received no compensation for his review other than a copy of To Love and Cherish from Bethany House, a division of Baker Publishing Group.

Nothing To Hide.

This is a funny title because I think I have been hiding from this blog. Where did the summer go? What have I been up to?
 In sometimes I feel like I have been in survivor mode. Bucket down the hatches and make it through. Yet I have seen God give me things that I have wanted for so long. I am beginning to move into more teaching and leadership roles in ministry and I am seeing a new confidence. I am also having good interaction with old friends that I thought were gone from my life. Plus I am meeting new people that make me thankful for the point I am in my life.
I am writing this blog to review a book. "Nothing to Hide" by J. Mark Bertrand. This is the third Roland March Mystery. I read and reviewed the previous book, "Pattern of Wounds". Roland is very much a loner. In this book, it seems like he is isolating himself even more. Even the chaos over changes in the police station, begin to isolate Roland as his leadership changes. Even if he didn't like or agree with the leadership, he finds comfort in the security and boundaries of it. In the previous book, Roland's wife Charlotte is his anchor. She always there to comfort him and give guidance. Their mutual grief over their daughter's death bonds them. Charlotte seems to be moving away from Roland. She has a spiritual faith that he doesn't share: she is busy with her law career and on the road all the time. Her appearances in this novel are limited to times of tragedy. Even the young neighbors who are Roland's safety and family have not only moved but are busy preparing for their first child. Again Roland is all alone.

So in this context, Roland is called to the murder scene. The victim's head is missing and his finger points to a clue. This case leads Roland into a messy maze. He follows one lead which he ends up stumbling and getting hurt. This is just a foreshadowing of what is to come. He stumbles his way into an undercover intelligence community where no one is really telling the truth. He puts people into jeopardy that he shouldn't, too easily trusts people that do have something to hide. He even learns that his own past is tied up into what is going on. He takes justice into his own hands and though he thinks he has nothing to lose and nothing to hide. I think in the end, he realizes that in his pursuit of justice, he risks way more than he should. In the end, the police community and his family are really what matter and honoring them.
 Plus we all have something to hide, there is more to the story than we all are willing to reveal.This is a good mystery and I was intrigued until the very end. I begin to have my suspicions about the killer, but only right before they are revealed.
I received no compensation for this review, other than a copy of this book form Bethany House, a division of Baker publishing.

P.S. I plan to start blogging more often.
 

Year Update and The Fiddler

Wow! The year is halfway over almost and it seems like not much changed.

Am I living up to "Create" as a theme. I think I have made the most progress in creating a community. I have also been volunteering at church  and that helps me use my gifts. My weak areas are in developing a job I love or I would settle for could stand. I would also like to do some type of craft or artwork. I really miss singing also.

I have been reading a lot lately. I received the following title from Bethany House-a division of Baker Publishing Group, The Fiddler by Beverly Lewis. I receive no compensation for reviewing this book other than a free copy of the book.

I think it is a good and easy read. I have never read any kind of Amish fiction before. This book is definitely Amish fiction. Because I am a newbie to the genre, I think there were stories about the minor characters that I was supposed to know from other books. I didn't know but it didn't really bother me.

So the basic premise is that this girl Amelia who is a classical violinist has a secret life as the fiddler Amy Lee, as in a bluegrass fiddler. Her father, boyfriend, and agent have her life planned for her. She is going to record classical music and travel the world. Her secret life as a fiddler is her attempt at her own life, a secret life. She is coming home form a concert and gets lost and stuck near Amish country. She is rescued or really just found by Michael, a man who has left his family because he refuses to join the Amish church. He is stuck between both worlds.

They return together to Amish country and the quiet life is refreshing to Amelia. With Amelia's help, Michael sees his world through new eyes. Without spoiling what happens, I like that through this meeting they help each other to discover a life that doesn't alienate their families, and gets them unstuck from being caught between what they want and the expectations of others. The plot is somewhat predictable but I did think it was heading somewhere else at times.

I don't think this is classical fiction by any means but it did make me compare their dram a to my own life and maybe realize that their is the best life in the middle of two extremes.

"My Own Worst Enemy, how to stop holding yourself back" by Janet Davis

From time to time, I get books to review. This time I chose this book because I had heard of the author. I often listen to Midday Connection on Moody radio. Janet Davis has appeared on there several times. I have always loved that she is very vulnerable about her own life and that she likes to explore the depth of people in the bible, particularly the female ones. To be honest, I didn't really pay much attention to the title when I chose this selection. So I was greatly surprised when this book came and it met me exactly where I am.
I shared in my previous post, that my goal is to Create this year. Most notably "I want to live the life that God has created in me not just what to do to survive." This book hit me over the head. I felt like Janet Davis had been reading my mind. I know that as she says,"I diminish my voice and my contribution".

I loved this book.  In the introduction, she shares that "she became acutely aware if how many awesome and gifted women spent significant amounts of time and energy neglecting, dismissing, or actively covering up their beauty and talent". I so think that I do this. I self-sabotage my life. I call it a fear of failure which it is, but to be honest I don't believe that someone would want me as their employee, their spouse, their friend or their mother. I don't believe that my words,and actions are effective. Janet Davis call this "Shining". She goes on to say "that good Christian women have been taught for generations that it is rude to talk about oneself, much less to shine." because we don't want to shine, we call this humility and think we are being spiritual. Instead we are missing the fact that we are gifted and unique. Ray Kane, another frequent Midday Connection guest says "we each are a unique fingerprint of God, and we express God through being whom he created us to be".
The book is divided into three sections Many Faces, Many Phases and Choices Along the Way.  She begins each chapter with an individual consideration, such as "Make a list of five subjects that you are so passionate about that you would stay up late just to discuss with friends" Then she explores the real life story of a woman, often herself and how God is revealing what is missing in their life. Then each chapter includes a story from scripture of how a woman needs to or has allowed God to shine in her life. Finally she shares a change in the real person's life. Each chapter contains personal challenges titled Your Story.

I am still working through many of these questions. I think working through many of these questions will enable me to create the life I am called to and allow me to shine. This book is definitely a journey, Janet Davis's journey but it can be my journey and your journey also.
   "Her previous painful life experiences became her deep wisdom and the seed of phenomenal inspiration for her creative soul which she now used to bless and comfort... her story shaped her ministry; her identity shaped her creativity.(p98)".

I received no compensation for this review other that a free copy of the book from Bethany House a division of Baker Publishing group. I saw this print on the Kelly Rae Roberts online shop. it is so appropriate.

 


http://shop.kellyraeroberts.com/collections/prints/products/permiission-to-shine-print

Create My World!

So Happy 2012! it is a few weeks in and already most of my thoughts for the year are gone.

Last Year, I decided to live my life according to a word for the year. Last years word was lover. I'm not sure how I succeeded but I do see myself as more relational and less concerned about being right.

This year's Word is CREATE.

Why this word? As I have gotten older I feel the need to be more creative. I used to be so analytical but I really want to express myself and what God is doing in me through my life.

Some ideas!
  I want to live the life that God has created in me not just what to do to survive. So I am going to examine my life particularly my career.
 I want to express myself through music, words and visual arts. I am really interested in creating mixed media art and writing a book.
I want to create a family. I am really praying about foster parenting and adoption. I would love to make some good friends to live life with. I also really long for a husband to share this life with. Mostly, I want to let God mold me into the Dawn he is making me.

So for me 2012 is about what God does through me to Creatively to Become Dawn!