Welcome to My World!

"Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord." Luke 2:10

As I ponder this passage as Mary does so often in the bible. I think of what I have been learning about myself from God. Do I welcome new things into my life or am I just afraid?

So much of my life has been marked by fear. Fear of being hurt, fear of the unknown, fear of rejection, fear of doing the wrong thing. I have been through all those things and yet God has held me up through them all.

So first of all --Do I welcome my savior into my life? Do I let him use me by revealing how he has made me strong through those past hurts? Do I let him heal my hurts and show me that through him I am being built into a precious creation?

Secondly,  do I welcome others into my life? This year has been a time of letting new people into my life. A new church, two new home churches, an accountability group, students in classes that I took this summer--and then also letting them slip away. Am I just as willing to try the next time around? Oh God let me welcome others into my life with an open heart, hands and mind.  As well as new people, do I welcome the old friends back into my life. Some who have gently slipped away and others who there has been great hurt and conflict. I sent out only a few Christmas cards this year with the hope of welcoming those people to stay a part of my life. There are still many others where I regret the relationship slipping away and want to welcome them into my life once more.

Lastly, do I welcome the future? Do I see God's faithfulness through my singleness? Do I read the story of Elizabeth and relate to her longing for a child,the emptiness of  barrenness,the wasted years or do I hope with expectation for the things to come? Lord let me trust you to guide me each day.

Savior thank you for saving me from my sin, my fears, my unrealistic expectations, my hurts, my desire to hide. Thank you that I have an eternal hope and a hope for each day.

 Each day may my prayer be "Welcome to my World"!

In His Grasp,
Dawn

Advent

It is almost Christmas. In fact it is Advent. What is Advent? It is a time to prepare our hearts for the coming of the Lord. I think it is a time to come to peace with what you have done this year, who you have become and to welcome the savior in your life next year.

Welcoming has been a big theme in my life this year. How do I welcome people into my life? What prejudices do I have that keep me from welcoming others. Do I make fun of people for not liking or thinking,or believing what I do. I think I am way more welcoming to those who don't believe in Jesus than I am who like the "wrong music", the "wrong worship tradition"or "wrong dress". I want to be open to whom God brings into my life whether they are completely different that what I would expect.

So I want to spend the next month growing in welcoming God into my heart, my time and my soul. I ordered an Advent devotional that I cannot wait for even though it is late, So right now I am singing through an old hymnal, reading Luke and meeting the people who await Jesus. I am also reading some prophesy in Isaiah of the coming King! So may I spend this time giving myself time to enjoy my Lord, time to reflect on who I am in the grace of God, time to welcome new and old into my life.

There is a book called the Advent Conspiracy--the premise is not about giving presents but presence. Lord may I be more present in all those who I come into contact this season and in the new year

Come Lord Jesus Come!

Valley of Vision--Intro

Hi,

I am going to make this a spiritual journal for a while. I don't think anyone reads it but Kelly anyway. I want people to read it--I want a single woman blog, a decorating blog--I am looking for a partner.

The Valley of Vision A Collection of Puritan prayers and Devotions by Arthur Bennett

I have wanted a copy of this book for some time. I am really drawn toward liturgy in my spiritual walk lately. I am also thinking of buying a Book of Common Prayer. At my old church, the Valley of Vision was often used in prayers and given as parting gifts to those who moved. Since I departed out the back door and not through some celebration--I never received one.

I had my tenth anniversary from the hospital and got rewards that you could buy anything with. I got a bread box(Super Excited-I hid my kitchen clutter in it) and this book. Who says secular jobs don't give you spiritual rewards.

This is from the back cover:

"The strength of Puritan character and life lay in prayer and meditation. In this practice the spirit of prayer was regarded as of first importance and the best form of prayer, for living prayer is the characteristic of genuine spirituality. Yet prayer is also vocal and may therefore on occasions be written. Consequently in the Puritan tradition there are many written prayers and meditations which constitute an important corpus of inspiring devotional literature.

Too often ex tempore prayer lacks variety, order and definiteness. The reason for this lies partly in a neglect of due preparation. It is here that the care and scriptural thoroughness which others found necessary in their approach to God may be of help. This book had been prepared not to 'supply prayers' but to prompt and encourage the Christian as he treads the path on which others have gone before"

I know that my prayer life is lacking. I think I am not sure what to pray. I have been reading the biography of Dietrich Bonhoeffer--it is taking longer than I thought because I tend to read too fast. Right now he is training seminary students--and he says they don't just need theology--they need to know how to pray, how to know God. I hope by going through the Valley of Vision--I will learn by those who have gone before how to pray. I also like to sing old hymns for the same reason.

So my prayer as I embark on this journey is "Be Now My Vision Oh Lord of My Heart". Then I think if I understand God's love for me, his calling of me--I may figure out the rest of the pieces.

Grasping Grace,

Dawn

Things I Like to Do!

I like the outdoors! Not like rugged endurance sports, but just to take a stroll in the woods. I am invigorated by just walking around and thinking. I love lakes and rivers and oceans. A good body of water rejuvenates my soul. On my recent vacation (stay cation), I drove to four different lakes to just look at them and see their beauty.

I love children! I have been spending lots of time with my young niece and nephew. They are hilarious and ask the funniest questions. It makes me look at life in a whole new way and to think about what I say.

I love to read! I love to be taken away and to meet new people and share their stories for just a little while.

I love to take a hot bath--it is my cure for everything. If I'm hot, if I'm cold, if my head hurts, I hurt myself(I am rather clumsy so this happens fairly often), or if I'm not tired.it is like all the stress, and pain just go away.

I love the fall! The walks outside. All the local harvest festivals! The changing of the leaves.

I love people. I like to meet new people and make new friends. I know this means that other people leave my life. It is sad but I truly believe that God brings into our life the people we need and that need us.

I love to browse stores. I work at a retail store and this is very frowned upon. Apparently it is all about converting lookers to buyers. I will hardly ever buy something from someplace the first time I go in.

I like to learn. Even though life's lessons are really hard.

A New Season.

So it is almost Fall or at least we think it is after school has started and Labor Day has past.

I am thinking it is time to prioritize my life. What do I want to do? What is important to me? I really want to spend more time with God but it seems to get lost in the business of my life.

I want this to be a season of rest. I sometimes let the good things even bible study or service to God steal my time with him.

Oh Lord please show me how not to forsake my first love--and how to love you more. I ask that you put me in the groups and ministries that will bring you the most glory and draw me closer to you. Lord lead me to new jobs where I can use the gifts that you have given me and Lord let me dwell in the beauty of your creation. Lord especially this particular creation. I can be so hard on myself, and never see your beauty reflected in me. Oh Lord let me see your grace in me.

A Year of Giving Thanks!

Yesterday was my Birthday! I always like to reflect on my life a little bit. I have met many new people this year and restored some old friendships. Until last summer, I had been feeling a little lonely. I am thankful that God gave me the courage to make new friends and blessed me with many wonderful people.
The Oakwood Girls:
I crashed a neighborhood bible study of a neighborhood that I do not live in. I have lived so much life with them in the last year. We have gone through family trials, trying to adopt children and just the joys and struggles of a year. I have been blessed by many--but Heather, Lori, Lisa, Julie and Mo you have become like sisters to me.
My House Church:
I'm not sure what a house church is, but I thought I would give it a try. I have been blessed by the members of this group in such a short time. I have a renewed heart for meeting my neighbors and loving them. I also really after being hurt by church want to dive in. Special note to my Quad--Janice, Kelly and Emily you are part of my heart.
Moody Midday Connection:
I have always been a denominational snob in some ways. I started listening to this program and I fell in love. I think this program encourages women to take a Dive and be real, honest, and share your struggles. We need God and brokennes as Christian women and not more roles,more masks and more schedules. I love all the guests. It makes me want to read all their books--mostly it makes me want to write a book and share my story.
My Old Friends:
Thanks for hanging in there when I was miserable. I think I have found a good place.
My coworkers:
I wouldn't have made it through the last few years. You put sunshine in my life. Thnaks for sharing your journeys.
My Family:
We have been through a lot and we are now--but God is bigger than all of it and we are still standing strong. Oh the blessing of children's smiles.
My God:
Not last because you have so blessed me with all the above, but because I am so loved by you--I can feel and love all of them. Thank you for the cross, thank you for calling me to you, thank you for being with me intimately when I often feel alone.

Thank you for the journey that is ahead.
dawn

Tired!

So it is Monday and I am soooooo tired.
Maybe it is because I worked too much this weekend. maybe because I have two jobs and until last week I was taking two classes.
I think maybe it is the weather.
If I am honest it is really that I haven't taken care of my soul. I need to take time to refresh. I love to walk in the outdoors and see the world around me. I love to laugh and hang out with others. I love to worship my God.
Somehow lately I have let my business, the heat, take away my resting in Him!

I need a period of solitude--a Sabbath. I need to rest in he who created me. I need to rest in his creation.

Jeremiah 6: 16 "ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls"

By grace,
Dawn

Autism Presentation

Autism

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Serving God and People too!

In 2005 after Hurricane Katrina, I had the opportunity to participate in a recovery trip to Biloxi, MS. It meant a great deal to me because when I was a child, I was in a disaster. When I was six years old, my house was completely destroyed in the Xenia tornado. Members of my family were injured and some friends were killed. The biggest impact on me as a child was that one day my life looked one way and the next it was completely different. In fact thisis the beginning of my faith in God. I was really scared. My Dad told me that it did not matter what we lost but just that we had each other and that God would take care of us. It helped, even though I was terrified of the wind for some time.

So back to Biloxi, when I first saw the damage I was scared. Later it was great to do my little part in helping the people get back on their feet. We cleaned out houses, we cleaned yards filled with several feet of debris and we just listened to hurting people.

I'm glad that I could minister to others as they had ministered to me.

Serving Him,

Dawn

My Journey to Becoming An Educator

Since I was a little girl, I have always been interested in helping people. Because of that desire, I always told people that when I grew up I would be either something in healthcare or a teacher. Although, I settled on a career in healthcare early on, I usually played games that involved teaching others. I also always found myself helping my friends in school. I used to even give my friends homework to do over the summer. My mother quickly put an end to that in order that I still had friends. So I went to college determined on becoming a physician, instead a teacher was developing within me. My experiences in college and since then have prepared me for a career in education. I have been most impacted by motivation, personal experience, and my individual goals for the future.
It is necessary for me to explain some things about myself in order for my motivation to be better understood. I am a person who loves God and who loves people. My love of God stirs in me a desire to help people to reach their fullest potential. There is a verse in the bible (2 Timothy 2:2, NASB) that best explains my philosophy of life and my philosophy of education. “The things you have heard in the presence of many witnesses, entrust to faithful men who are able to teach others also.” For me this verse means first that people have invested their lives into me. I appreciate mentors, teachers, colleagues, and ministers who have invested time and energy into me. I have grown tremendously as a person and have overcome many adversities in life. In addition, I love to read and learn new things. I am definitely a life long learner. Next, because of how people have invested in me, I want to invest in others. I want to teach others about God, about the world and my love of Mathematics. I want people to be able to overcome their struggles and to learn things that are difficult for them. I want people to be challenged and to not just get by in school or in life. I want to motivate others to be life long learners like me. Lastly, I want them to inspire others to learn. Whether we are teachers, parents or in other fields, we are all teaching people new things. I want to inspire others to have the self-efficacy in what they know so that they are confident to teach others. This motivation has inspired me to want to move this desire into a profession.
The next thing that has shaped my desire is my personal experience. It began with my play teaching and helping of friends as a child. This continued when I attended university. I was often helping classmates with schoolwork. I was involved in a campus ministry organization. I began teaching small groups and seminars through this ministry. My junior and senior year in college, I became a Calculus Teaching Assistant. I loved this experience, because I loved helping the students learn when they were confused. Some students I encouraged to take courses that were more appropriate to their skill level. Up until college, I had always had a great fear of public speaking. This is probably why I had never considered becoming a teacher. I took some speech classes to help me to overcome that fear. The speech class helped a little but mostly my experience in the campus ministry and my experience as a teaching assistant helped me to overcome this great fear of public speaking. Yet in college, I was still determined to become a physician. Late in my junior year in college, I was studying for the medical school admissions test and decided that I did not want to be a physician. I decided to go into full time ministry. After college, I went away to work for a Christian ministry. There was a rigorous application process and emotionally I did not survive. I was asked to go home. I found myself as a college graduate with no idea of what I would be doing professionally. Eventually, I ended up working at a local laboratory. Even though I hated many things about this job, the one thing that I really enjoyed was training new employees. I became a member of the training committee and served as my department trainer. Also during this time, I worked at a few business colleges as a teacher to Medical Assistants. I loved teaching students. Also during this time, I was very active in leading ministries to women and youth. I also helped to home school several students. My laboratory position developed into a position at the hospital. I designed my new position which is a position for a person who only likes to work with people part of the time. Much of my time is spent isolated in my office or taking to people on the phone. This position quickly taught me that I needed to be involved directly with people. In the last few years, I learned about a program that was designed to give people with Math and/or Science degrees a teaching degree in the year. The first year, I let my fears keep me from applying. The next year, I did apply and I was accepted. This year long program taught me that in many ways I have always been a teacher. I have had a teaching license for two years.
After completing this program, my goal has been to be a high school or middle school Math or Life Science teacher. I would prefer to be a Math teacher. I want to be a teacher who challenges their students. I think most people find math difficult. Because of that, they develop an attitude that they cannot understand it. I want to work with my students to understand what they are thinking about a problem and help them to design a method of understanding the problem. I want my students to experience success and to not just simply pass their classes. I also think I would one day like to become a guidance counselor to help students to overcome their adversities and to design a plan for after graduation. I also would really enjoy becoming a foster parent or an adoptive parent. I know that these children may have diverse abilities or come from a different culture. I need to be equipped to parent these children.
Because of my personal motivation, my life experiences, and my individual goals for the future, I am very grateful that I have decided to take this course in order to understand students with diverse abilities. This course has shown me how when I felt different in the classroom or in life, I became overcome by fear and insecurities. These fears and insecurities kept me from developing my potential socially, academically and professionally. I want to understand all the students in my classroom. This course has exposed me to many ways that individuals learn and resources for helping them. I believe that this class has equipped me to become a better educator and a member of society. It has shown me as a teacher that I need to understand the culture and diverse abilities of my students. I believe that through this course I am better equipped to understand those that I encounter in my everyday life and in my future profession as a teacher.

Cottage (not) By The Sea

This is my little house. I love my house. It is a two bedroom cottage/bungalow. I have very close neighbors, but my house sits up on a hill.

If I close my eyes, I can almost imagine it is by the sea. I can hear the waves crashing on the shore. Since there are lots of trees across from me. Sometimes in my mind, it is my little cottage in the woods. Maybe Goldilocks will stop by for a visit.

Last summer, I went on vacation to Tybee Island, Ga. Some friends and I rented a house. We didn't stay in a cottage but the company has many. I love to read about all the fun cottages that they own and are constantly redecorating and remodeling.

You can too at http://www.mermaidcottages.com/. I have learned about a designer of cottages Jane Coslick(http://janecoslick.com/) and more recently The Lettered Cottage,http://www.theletteredcottage.net/. What inspiration!!

They are often decorating cottages which is so much fun. I dream of someday decorating another cottage maybe by the sea or just in Ohio.

Dawn

A Butcher, A Baker, A Candlestick Maker!

First of all this post is not about men in my life. It would be a very short post.

Instead, this post is about "What to do When I grow up?"

I know I am grown up, but I have never quite figured it out. Until I was twenty, I always wanted to be a doctor. Then I wanted to be in full time Christian work... then I have just had jobs. Not that I haven't learned tons and met great people through those experiences.

Two years ago, I went back to school to be a teacher. I am licensed to be a math and science teacher in high school or middle school. It seems like a good fit for me. I am now going back to school to renew my license, but I do not have a job.

I just want to do something that I am passionate about. I want to go to work excited. I want to be challenged, I want to be creative, I want to make a difference in the life of those around me.

I want to be the best Dawn I can be.

.

Becoming Dawn

I love Jane Austen.

I love her books. I love the characters. I love the movies that are based on books. Mostly I love the idea that a simple woman who never married impacted the world so much that hundreds of years later--she is loved my so many.

In the last few years, I have seen a few movies about her life. I'm not sure I loved the movies. I do love the title of "Becoming Jane". I saw it on my 40th birthday. What happened in her life to make her write books. How did her simple country life impact so many. How does she understand people so well?

Because I have those thoughts, I want to explore that journey in my own life. Who is God molding me to be? Why am I single and in my 40s? What do random events in my life mean for me, for those I know and for the world around me? How will I be remembered? Am I "faithful servant" as Jesus says? Do I deserve his praise?

So come along with me and let's journey together to become the best "Dawn" or whomever you can be?